Thursday, November 5, 2009
A Gift I'd Like to Give
I've always wanted to be a superhero of some sorts. You know? Spiderman, Batman, Superman, The Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers, you name it. Even still do this day, I wouldn't mind flinging webs and swinging through the cities around here, or flying sky high to save a crashing plane. But, I'm just your average everyday normal guy. I'm not a Humanitarian Aide, Firefighter, Policeman, or Doctor, I'm just, me. I'm a 17 year old, high school teenager, who has not yet matured, or reached his potential. But, I am a 17 year old, high school teenager, who shows compassion, is respectful, and appreciates the well being of others. Now, some of you may be questioning why I'm rambling on like this. You're waiting for me to reveal "my gift". "A Gift I'd Like to Give", is the gift of service. I'm not a hero, and nor will I ever be. But, I can open the door for a friend of mine, help an elderly lady across the street, climb a tree to retrieve a neighbor's cat that got stuck up there, and so on. There are plenty of opportunities to help out with an act of service. All I need to do is reach out and lend a helping hand. How hard is that? Not hard at all. From picking up turkeys, to aerating in the rain, I remember it all. I remember the pain, the cold, and just about everything else. But, it was worth it, completely worth it. There's been plenty of service given to me, and I think that it's time that I return the favor. I'm going to be a better brother, son, cousin, friend, student, and so on. And on those days when I am put down and what not, I always say, you don't need to be a superhero to lend an act of service. Just be yourself.
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I really liked the combination of all the superheros! The ultimate superhero!
ReplyDeleteI think you are trying to be a hero and give the give of help..
I think you should add more of why you want this. a stoy or experiance.
Well, this is an interesting approach but I don't exactly see how this is valid in answering the question "what gift would you like to give?" I don't really know what to say to you abou this piece of writing. I feel as though it would fit so much better on a topic of dreams and wishes, or memories and outlooks on how life was for you as a child. I do not see how exactly this would benefit a person. Sure, it would be great to have special powers like Batman and Robin and get to drive the Batmobile but how would this help someone out? What is the gift you would want to give? Think about this gift and I hope this helps out some what to you, if you could receive a gift from someone, what would it be? love? hope? passion? desire? having faith in yourself? Think about it, what gift would benefit you the very most. I see that you are a great writer and everything, do not think that this comment was just here to insult your peice, but I personally know that you have it in you to write an amazing response.
ReplyDeleteFirst person. present tense.
ReplyDeleteSounds like you are giving the gift of Super powers.
Maybe you could make it like an analogy? find real life super powers?
Wait, what?
ReplyDeleteRight now, this seems like you were just kind of bored and decided to ramble about superheroes then try to write an essay. This can work though.
I agree with Ella Louise. Maybe you could find real life super powers and tie it in to 'giving a gift'. Some real life superpowers include: gift of giving, service, love, hope, etc.
Think about how you can tie superheroes into giving a gift. Also, think about who your audience is for this essay.
I like the crazy impossible gift of being that supper hero. but do you want it and share it with others or have others get the supper power?
ReplyDeleteyou shouldn't have put now your wondering... just put it. be out there. but make sure you state your gift. i've read some of your other writing and you've really matured in your writing already in this class. i really like your tone in this piece.
ReplyDeleteI love the beginnig and I noticed your fantasies coming out.
ReplyDeleteI think you didn't know what gift you wanted togive.
I love the beginning but finish it.
This is an interesting idea. Being a super hero in a boy's shoes, through your gift of service. The good thing about your gift is that there are so many ways you can go with it. The bad thing about your gift is that there are so many ways you can go with it. But don't worry I have the same problem.
ReplyDeleteSo what you need to start thinking about now is how you're going to narrow this down. Pin point what you what to explain about service and how it'll effect the people it touches. Give specific examples or ideas about how you have or will carry it out. Give a life story as an example, this will get your reader more interested in you. Therefor getting your reader more interested in your idea.
Some times the easiest things to write about are the things we love. Try and intertwin things you love into this writing.
Good work, keep going. Don't get discouraged.
Everybody thinks the give has to be tangible. That we have to see or feel or be able to touch this gift. What is the problem of giving a gift of service. I like that. I think that being respectful, compassionate, and caring about others is a great gift as well. I think any route you choose is good. Maybe a personal experience or something like that could add to your essay.
ReplyDeleteDear Storm,
ReplyDeleteI think that you show a lot of maturity to recognize these qualities about yourself. You are full of potential and you are a kind and generous person.
I was always impressed by you. You care about people.
You are SUPER.